The cat o’ nine tails, but that’s not the right story. Let’s start this over again then shall we. Guys, we’re talking about the cat with nine lives. All cats have them, or haven’t you noticed. Look a lot closer next time and see how their survival instincts play out in the yard. Old yapper can bark all night if he wants to but it’s him that going to get the whack over the head from some irate neighbor. In the meantime, little Felix has run a mile already. Or if he’s the snarky one, then he’s probably laughing his paws off. The battle cats would too, except they can’t right now. Right about now, they’re laughing at you, would you believe.
The thing is, many of you reading this just can’t seem to find enough cat chowder. Many of you cannot catch up to these nuisances. Or if you’re on their side, many of you have been bitten silly by older yappers, or something worse in the viral space, and it’s all game over by now. It does not need to be this way, so stop laughing at these poor guys, battle cats. Because we’re whiskering into their ears. We need to do this clearly because they don’t hear as well as you do. They’re not light on their paws like you. Life’s very unfair for a lot of them. Because while all you need to do is miaow for your food on the table they still need to go out there and buy it.
Life’s pretty hard for them, so spare them a miaow or two. Give these guys a break and let them have their thousand lives if they want it. Oh, you’re still with us. Well, thank goodness for that. Shoo, scram, cat, we’re talking to these guys. Well, here’s the thing, you can do well with your battle cats game now because now you can play to your heart’s content for free, for as long as you like and for the rest of your life if that’s going to be your cuppa tea. Or Joe, whatever you like. Different strokes, for different folks. Cat’s strokes too.
For you, all for nothing. In just a few minutes from now, you’re going to be playing battle cats again, this time with your spanking new battle cats hack. And if you’re not feeling as perky as a cat right now and just want to chill for a while, that’s okay too. Time for a tea break. Or a coffee break. Or coffee, no, did that, or a smoke break h’mm, now that’s a good idea, just a sec back with you in a mo aah, yes, that feels so much better. Anyway, where were we, oh yes, you can take your eyes off the cat’s tail for a while but do keep yourself posted on any fresh new developments out there. You may or may not be prompted.